Damsel in Distress – New Lyrics!

For all those who find “Up in the Gallery” by Franz Kafka too depressing, Robin has written a text where men can still be real heroes. Have fun!

Damsel in Distress


She’s held captive in a castle by sadistic noble men.

She is tied up by those psychos, the “Brotherhood of Steel”.

She is young and beautiful. She is thoroughly innocent.

She is chained right to a stake. Her fate is to be sealed.

You’ve made it to that eerie castle

You are bound to rescue her.

You will fight them and defeat them

Then you’ll flee with her.


Captured in a monastery by religious sadists.

She’s held captive by those men, the “Order of Ordeal”.

Tied up in a torture chamber by demonic rapists.

She’ll endure what’s yet obscure, pain is all she’ll feel.

You’ve made it to that monastery.

You are bound to fight for her.

You will meet them and defeat them.

Then you’ll flee with her.


Already she’s undressed.

A victim of excess.

She is young and beautiful.

She’s so helpless.

So defenseless.

The damsel in distress.

(Machine gune fire.

Hero: Hi Sweetheart, u okay? Come here… come here…)

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